Introduction
We’ve been on a journey these past couple of days, uncovering the strongholds in our lives—those areas where we feel trapped, those patterns of thought or behavior that keep us stuck and separated from God’s best. On Day 1, we acknowledged that it’s not about us, and we began to examine our lives through the lens of God’s Kingdom. On Day 2, we began to address these strongholds directly, identifying what needs to change, digging into the roots of our struggles, and committing ourselves to the battle plan for freedom.
Today, on Day 3, we’re going to take a hard look at what we can control in this journey toward healing and restoration. What can we, in our own strength, begin to change? And how do we take responsibility for what is within our power to control, while recognizing that some things are beyond our ability to fix alone?
This is a crucial step. Sometimes, healing begins with taking ownership of what’s in our hands. It’s easy to get bogged down by everything that feels out of our control, but today, we’re going to focus on what we can control, because in doing so, we take back the power that God has already given us.
1. Identifying What You Can Control
First, take a moment to look back at the list of strongholds that you’ve created. These strongholds—whether they’re habits, addictions, past traumas, or destructive patterns—are the things that have kept you bound. Now, it’s time to go through this list and ask yourself, What can I control in the flesh?
Be honest with yourself. Mark the strongholds you feel you can change with your own actions, the ones that are within your ability to tackle right now. Put a checkmark next to those.
For example, if you’ve listed things like excessive drinking, a toxic relationship, or a job that drains your soul, ask yourself: Can I make a change here? Can I do something about this today, with my own choices and actions?
If the answer is yes, then mark it. Maybe you can stop drinking that extra glass of wine at night. Maybe you can take steps to get out of that unhealthy relationship. Maybe it’s time to find a new job or to set stronger boundaries in your current one.
This is where the rubber meets the road. There are things you can control, and it’s important to be proactive about them. What are you waiting for? Why suffer another minute in a situation that you have the power to change?
2. Creating a Plan of Action
Now that you’ve identified the strongholds you can control, it’s time to take responsibility and make a plan. What steps will you take to overcome these? What’s in your capacity to change?
Take a new list and write down how you will begin to address each stronghold you’ve marked. For example:
• “I can stop drinking 10 beers at once. I will switch to non-alcoholic beer or limit myself to one beer.”
• “I can break up with my boyfriend. I know it’s unhealthy, and I deserve better.”
• “I can quit my job. I know it’s draining me spiritually and emotionally, and I’m going to look for something that aligns with my values.”
The key here is to break these actions down into real, practical steps that you can take in your day-to-day life. Don’t overcomplicate it. Start with what you know you can do. If something feels too big, break it down further. Remember, Rome wasn’t built in a day. Each step you take to ward healing is progress.
3. When You Can’t Control It: Recognizing True Strongholds
But here’s the hard truth: not everything is within your control. And this is where the journey of healing gets tricky, because there are some things that you cannot fix on your own. These are the true strongholds—the things that go beyond your ability to change in the flesh.
Some of the strongholds you face are generational, passed down through the line of your family. The Bible speaks of generational curses, and you may have inherited certain struggles—be it addiction, depression, anxiety, or unhealthy relationships. If your father struggled with alcoholism, for instance, it might be easy to think, “Well, it runs in the family. I’m bound to struggle with the same things.”
But it’s crucial to recognize the difference between what is a result of your choices and what is truly a generational stronghold—something that’s been passed down and might require God’s intervention to break.
For example, you may struggle with drinking, but ask yourself: Do I drink because I’m hurt or because I’m escaping something? Or is it because this is a habit I learned from watching my parents? And even more importantly: Can I stop?
If you are able to stop drinking for a period of time, and you’re simply choosing to drink when you feel upset or stressed, then you are not dealing with a generational curse. You’re dealing with a stronghold that requires your willpower to break. But if you find you cannot stop, and you’ve tried many times, it might be time to acknowledge that this is something deeper—something beyond your control that needs God’s intervention.
Understanding what you can control versus what is beyond you is essential. If something is a true stronghold, you can’t fix it with willpower alone. You’ll need God to come in and break that chain.
4. Taking Responsibility and Trusting God
Here’s the bottom line: There are things you can control, and there are things you cannot. But regardless of which category each stronghold falls into, it’s important to take responsibility for the things you can change. Don’t let your past, your pain, or your circumstances be an excuse to stay stuck. God has already given you the power to make choices, to take action, and to trust Him for the strength you need.
In Philippians 4:13, Paul writes, “I can do all this through him who gives me strength.”
Whatever is in your capacity to change, God has already given you the strength to take those first steps. But for the things you cannot control, lean on God even more. He is the one who has the power to break every chain, to heal every wound, and to set you free.
Conclusion
We are on a journey toward freedom, but that journey begins with honestly assessing what we can control and actively doing something about it. It’s time to stop waiting, stop suffering, and start taking responsibility for what’s in your hands. God has empowered you to make the changes you need, but for the areas beyond your control, surrender them to Him. Trust Him to heal, restore, and break the chains that bind you.
Today, ask yourself: What can I control? What steps can I take today to start moving forward?
Prayer for Day 3:
Father, I thank You for the power You have given me to take control of my life in partnership with You. I recognize that some things are beyond my control, but I also know that You are faithful to help me overcome the strongholds that I can address. Give me the courage to take action where I can, and the wisdom to surrender what I cannot change into Your hands. Thank You for Your strength, and for the freedom that comes from walking in obedience to Your Word. In Jesus’ name, I pray. Amen.
Key Takeaways for Day 3
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Focus on What You Can Control:
Identify the areas of your life where you can make practical changes and take responsibility for those actions. Even small steps can lead to big transformations over time.
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Take Action:
Create a clear, step-by-step plan to address the strongholds you can change. Be intentional and proactive in making adjustments to your habits, relationships, or daily routines.
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Recognize Your Limitations:
Not everything is within your power to fix. Acknowledge the strongholds that require God’s divine intervention and trust Him to do what you cannot.
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Surrender the Rest to God:
For areas beyond your control—past wounds, generational strongholds, or deep emotional struggles—give them over to God in prayer. Trust in His ability to bring healing and restoration.
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Trust God’s Strength:
You are not alone in this journey. God has given you the strength and resources to act where needed, and His grace will sustain you for what lies beyond your capacity.
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Obedience Unlocks Freedom:
Walking in obedience to God’s Word and trusting Him with your strongholds is the path to true freedom. Freedom begins when you combine action with surrender.
“I can do all this through him who gives me strength.” – Philippians 4:13